Released from the shackles that bounded me.
Freed from the prison that held me.
Set free from the tortures that tortured me.
I'm in my haven now, I'm away from those fears and doubts.
The ones that tried to tear me down are long gone from me now.
I'm brought to a land of peace, away from the snares of their infirmities.
Remembering the demons that tortured me.
I'll never forget the nights of un rest and no peace.
Or the torture I felt in my soul as I was at an all time low laying with the demons in the ditches.
I grew up in a snake pit fighting for my life.
I grew up in a snake pit fighting for every breath inside.
Wednesday, March 27, 2013
Emotions
Hello pain, pain that I thought I put aside.
Pain that haunted my youth and sorrow that brought tears to my eyes.
Youth is a traumatic time in a person's life.
Emotions run wild and right and wrong are tested through each person's life.
It makes it worse if you have say per chance a rare genetic blood disease.
A disease that brings out the emotions in you and can bring you to your knees.
A disease that shapes your whole childhood, youth, young adult life too.
A disease that frightens the very whits out of you.
But no one knows this pain you feel. This time in your life.
Your suppose to be normal and yet you feel so much more inside.
Emotions are not just your average teenage high.
They are epic on a mountain top ready to sprout wings and fly.
They make you happy, sad, angry too. But when you hurt it cuts down to the very core of you.
No one stops to think that one dirty look can send you into a tail spin.
They don't know the demons you fight each day just to live.
Emotions of this nature are quite dangerous. That's why God is a constant strength to those who let him.
People don't understand they can tear apart a young life.
Fear, love, hate, all multiplied by ten thousand and that's what a person like this feels.
It takes an army of angels a God of mercy to intervene.
Because you put your faith in God and so feelings you learn to deal with. And over time you learn how to rationalize, cope, and deal. You learn that even though the world feels like it's coming to an end, does not mean that it really is all going to end. And even though it hurts so bad when love leaves you. You learn to move on and be glad alone or with someone new. For those who choose solitary its a hard life to cope with. But who else but God could even understand what your faced with?
Emotions so strong like a tidal wave, a current, a meteoroid shower inside.
Ripping you to shreds every time you feel, think, or cry.
So trust in God and don't let the emotions overwhelm you.
For God is the only one who could ever understand and sort through all the emotions in you.
Pain that haunted my youth and sorrow that brought tears to my eyes.
Youth is a traumatic time in a person's life.
Emotions run wild and right and wrong are tested through each person's life.
It makes it worse if you have say per chance a rare genetic blood disease.
A disease that brings out the emotions in you and can bring you to your knees.
A disease that shapes your whole childhood, youth, young adult life too.
A disease that frightens the very whits out of you.
But no one knows this pain you feel. This time in your life.
Your suppose to be normal and yet you feel so much more inside.
Emotions are not just your average teenage high.
They are epic on a mountain top ready to sprout wings and fly.
They make you happy, sad, angry too. But when you hurt it cuts down to the very core of you.
No one stops to think that one dirty look can send you into a tail spin.
They don't know the demons you fight each day just to live.
Emotions of this nature are quite dangerous. That's why God is a constant strength to those who let him.
People don't understand they can tear apart a young life.
Fear, love, hate, all multiplied by ten thousand and that's what a person like this feels.
It takes an army of angels a God of mercy to intervene.
Because you put your faith in God and so feelings you learn to deal with. And over time you learn how to rationalize, cope, and deal. You learn that even though the world feels like it's coming to an end, does not mean that it really is all going to end. And even though it hurts so bad when love leaves you. You learn to move on and be glad alone or with someone new. For those who choose solitary its a hard life to cope with. But who else but God could even understand what your faced with?
Emotions so strong like a tidal wave, a current, a meteoroid shower inside.
Ripping you to shreds every time you feel, think, or cry.
So trust in God and don't let the emotions overwhelm you.
For God is the only one who could ever understand and sort through all the emotions in you.
The Invisible Pain Inside Me
Normalcy escapes me, haunted dreams stay with me, and now I don't want to leave the house.
Madness overcomes me, my brain explodes within me and I can feel the pressure rising.
Do you know what it's like to feel every blood cell flowing through your veins and in each cell it feels as if tiny pins or gouging knives are stabbing out your veins?
Could you understand what it's like to be in so much pain that it radiates throughout your body and into the veins, through all your insides, your very aware of the horrific pain?
Can you stand to cry yourself to sleep at night because the disease is getting to you?
But you put on a brave face, and turn to God for an escape, and pray that somehow you will get through.
God does work in mysterious ways as he is in constant control of your life.
Because you believed in him after he first died for you.
And so your life you gave to Christ, so he sees your pain. And from time to time when the time is right he steps in to heal your pain and sometimes he does such amazing miraculous things like bringing you back from the dead one night when you died in your sleep.
And it is through these times I learn to trust in God more than ever before.
So even though I have to endure the little pain I feel, and I say that in reverence to Christ because he died for us and so much pain was put on him on the cross.
So my pain is small compared to his and what he took on for us.
And so if Christ can do that for us and give his life for ours. Then rise from the grave on the third day then this blood disease I can bare and live my life for him.
Madness overcomes me, my brain explodes within me and I can feel the pressure rising.
Do you know what it's like to feel every blood cell flowing through your veins and in each cell it feels as if tiny pins or gouging knives are stabbing out your veins?
Could you understand what it's like to be in so much pain that it radiates throughout your body and into the veins, through all your insides, your very aware of the horrific pain?
Can you stand to cry yourself to sleep at night because the disease is getting to you?
But you put on a brave face, and turn to God for an escape, and pray that somehow you will get through.
God does work in mysterious ways as he is in constant control of your life.
Because you believed in him after he first died for you.
And so your life you gave to Christ, so he sees your pain. And from time to time when the time is right he steps in to heal your pain and sometimes he does such amazing miraculous things like bringing you back from the dead one night when you died in your sleep.
And it is through these times I learn to trust in God more than ever before.
So even though I have to endure the little pain I feel, and I say that in reverence to Christ because he died for us and so much pain was put on him on the cross.
So my pain is small compared to his and what he took on for us.
And so if Christ can do that for us and give his life for ours. Then rise from the grave on the third day then this blood disease I can bare and live my life for him.
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